Newspaper Archive of
N. Warren Town and County News
Norwalk, Iowa
July 11, 2019     N. Warren Town and County News
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July 11, 2019

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Thursday, July 11, 2019 N/Warren Town and County News Page Eleven Mayl to a Real Person, PIq :asq. ? By Dorothy Rosby I once ordered virus software from a particular company. Turns out, it would have been easier to have a virus. I was unable to download the software, so I emailed the support desk for help as directed. When none was forthcoming, I purchased another brand and emailed the first company asking for a refund. That's when they offered to help. Then they couldn't find any record of my order. Then they asked me to tell them what happened. Then they asked me to tell them again. After more than a month of emails back and forth, they sent me a message saying, "Unfortunately, these issues are best resolved over the phone. Please call at your convenience." They must have meant at their convenience because they didn't include a toll-free number and they left me on hold for twenty minutes - twice. Eventually, I was able to speak to a real person, or so I thought. I'll call him SJ for Smug Jerk because he was one, not because that's his name, which I can't remember. His helpful response was, "You're past the thirty-day refund period." "But I've been emailing you for thirty days." "Doesn't matter. That's our policy." The only thing more infuriating to a customer than saying, "That's our policy" is spitting on them. SJ said his supervisor would email me the next day. I told him I'd rather give him my phone number." "He won't call." ' ]hy not? Your email said these issues are best resolved by phone." "Only within thirty days." That's when I did something that I normally reserve only for the people I love; I yelled at him. I don't remember what I said, but I know it did nothing to change the policy. And SJ was right. His supervisor didn't call. Nor did he email. Nor did he send my refund. Customer service has changed in the age of online shopping. Now we spend our days emailing faceless companies, being put on hold by people who may or may not go to lunch while we wait, live chatting on our computer with technicians who can type faster than we can, and talking to recordings, my personal favorite. At least AJ was a real person - sort of. I'd already kicked the wall and cursed the credit card industry by the time I got around to calling the customer service number on the back of my credit card. I was hoping for a helpful human being or a reasonable facsimile. Instead I got Recorded Rita. "If you would like help in English, please say English or press one." "English or press one." "I'm sorry. I didn't hear you. If you would like help in English, please say " Apparently she didn't get the joke. "English 7 "Please say lost card protection, new card features, rate quotes, or problems with my bill." "Huh.W' "I'm sorry, I didn't hear you. Please say lost card protection, new card features " "Problems with my stupid bill." I'm a slow learner. "I'm sorry. I didn't hear you. Please say " "Problems with my bill." "Are you having problems with your bill? Please say yes or no." "Well, duh!" "I'm sorry. I didn't hear you. Are you having problems " 'Tes," I said, as loudly as I'd screamed at SJ. Then I remembered this call might be monitored for quality assurance purposes. "I'm sorry to hear that." But she didn't sound sorry. "I'll transfer you to our billing department." "Wait! Are there real people there?" She didn't answer. Clearly Rita has poor hearing and no sense of humor. But I'll say this for her. She never loses her temper and she's very polite. Her last words to me were, "Thank you for using your (name of worthless) credit card." "I'm sorry. I didn't hear you." Dorothy Rosby is a syndicated columnist and the author of several humor books, including I Used to Think I Was Not That Bad and Then I Got to Know Me Better. Classified advertising is 25 cents a word with a $3.50 minimum and MUST be paid in advance of publication. Thark you ads of 30 words or less are $3.50 (plus 10 cents per additional word.) Bring ads to the (ffice with payment, or drop ads and payment in our door slot after hours. You may also email ads "nd drop payment at the office, as long as we receive payment before publication. We reserve the right to accept or refuse any or all advertising. Publisher reserves the right to cancel any advertisement at any time. Call 5:5-981-0406 or email news@norwalknewspaper.com with questions. Deadline is noon on Friday. For Sale Services Services Services 527 Lane, 3 BR, new Clean Cut Tree Service Norwalk Seasonal kitchen and bath, Removals, trimming, Services laminated wood flooring, stump grinding, brush Lawn care, snow removal, new windows, 1st floor cleanup, fully equippedirrigation, Landscaping family room, LL family and insured. Free consul- design, installation, and room and room for 4th tations, 515-557-0269. maintenance. Call 515- bedroom; $142,900. 402-2364. Call Black Gold Realty, 515-681-6310 Patava Concrete Taking orders for tearouts, For Lease patios, replacement, new Turnbull'sTree Service construction, driveways, Topping, Trimming, Tree OFFICE SPACE garage slabs. FREE and Stump Removal, FOR LEASE: ESTIMATES. Call Matt Brush Clean-Up, Land 1200 Square feet, located on Sunset [rive. Palen, 210-1284, or Tim Clearing. Free Estimates; Prime location Patava, 210-1285. Fully Insured. Kevin Turnbull 515-282-7739 Call Steve 515-490-t691. Hate cleaning? Love cleaning? Norwex is the answer! Save you time, $, and risk of chemicals! Kim Ginkens, Norwex Ind. Consultant, 515-991-9821, KimGinkens.norwex.biz. Have something to sell? Have a service to promote? Have a job opening to fill? Call us today or use the form below and ADVERTISE! Garage Sale season is here! Utilize our classifieds section to advertise y ur sale - it's a very economical way to get buyers to your garage! Call us today or use the form to the right and ADVERTISE: I I I I I I I I I I I nmmmmmmmnmnnmmnn~ m Warren m and County SUBSCRIPTION FORM For Residents of Warren & Polk Counties One Year $20.00 Senior Citizens (65 years or older) $17.00 I Residents Outside of Warren & Polk Counties add $6.00 I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I Name New Renewal Cancel I I I I I m Address m m m m. m I I I Mail or drop off to: I I I i N/Warren Town and County News I I 1122 Main Street, Suite 1 , l P.O. Box 325 I I Norwalk, IA 50211 I I I L ,m m m m m m. m m J It's easy to advertise -in the N/Warren Town and County News classifieds. Use the form below to compose your ad, and mail or drop it:by our office before 12:00 p.m. on Fridays. Use an envelope and our door slot after business hours. To keep costs down, classified ads must be paid for in advance. Classified ads are 25 per word with a $3.50 minimum. Simply count your words (phone number = 1 word) and multiply by 25 . Thank you ads of 30 words or less are $3.50, with 10 for each additional word. Classified ads must be paid in full i before they will run. PLEASE PRINT CLEARLY PLEASE INCLUDE PAYMENT Name Address Phone We reserve the fight to acc~bt or refuse all adverlising. Publisher reserves the fight to cancel an adverlisement at any time. T: ,:; %: